Friday, June 26, 2009

Oh How I Love to Nibbles on Dem Mousie Feets!

So, lately I've been seeing ads for "indoor cat food." Supposed to supply all the nutrition your "indoor cat" needs. As opposed to what? An outdoor cat, obviously. An outdoor cat that apparently has a very different diet from an indoor cat. All that being said, can you imagine how the ingredient list of the "indoor cat" food must read?

Ingredients: Bacon suet, sunflower oil, motor oil, bunny entrails, mouse by products, cheese, your neighbor's chicken, dead racoon liver, easily digestible garbage can protein, baby bird eggs, hospital waste kidney meat, BHA (butylated hydroxyanisol), BHT (butylated hydroxytoluene), folic acid, menadione sodium bisulfite complex, rock salt, propylene glycol (from antifreeze), corn cob, calcium carbonate (from expired Rolaids), ferrous sulfate (from licking rusted iron), manganese sulfate, roadkill bone meal, zinc oxide, Vitamins A, B, D#, supplements, sewer water sufficient for processing

Yeah. Whoever paid for this marketing campaign needs to be fired yesterday.

6 comments:

rschmidt said...

Mmmm...ferrous sulfate (from licking rusted iron)...It's a texture thing.

Susan Maxwell Schmidt said...

You bustin' on me? Texture is important. Bouncy food is icky. I don't really think you should be using such a brilliantly insightful post to expose my own personal food texture issues. You don't love me.

rschmidt said...

...the taste cats love....now in a new exciting flavor..*Road Pizza*

Susan Maxwell Schmidt said...

For finicky eaters. Like a cat is ever finicky, THEY EAT MOUSE BRAINS! And then they leave the rest on the porch, just in case you might want a snack. Because *they* love you and understand texture is important.

rschmidt said...

As compared to Dogs who eat their own poop and then let you know how yummy it was by giving you wet sloppy kisses. Talk about finicky.

Susan Maxwell Schmidt said...

And Kat Krunchies (tm), don't forget that puppy delicacy. They just don't get that the litter box is NOT a smorgasbord. I imagine it's also a texture thing.